Something True- Everyone Is Fighting A Battle

This week is the one when am suppose to be doing my "Something True" from my "Something Old, New, Borrowed, True Series."  But that darn thing called life sometimes gets really super busy.  Sometimes I get really super lazy and other times I am not in any super mood to write.  Because of that I have neglected doing this post until now.  I know I could skip doing the post if I wanted to. After all, this is my blog.  But here's the thing....I've mentioned before how I am a noncommittal type person.  This is something I really want to stay committed to.  So as my day is coming to an end I have had the nagging feeling that I need to do this post knowing that tomorrow I won't be able to.   I've known what I have wanted to write.  I believe it to be true so here it is. 

EVERYONE IS FIGHTING A BATTLE!

Do you ever start comparing yourself to others?  Do you ever compare your house to others? Your car? Your body, hair, weight? Your financial situation?  I know I do.  If I said I didn't I would be lying.  I know we aren't suppose to covet and be jealous of others but I'm only human.  It's bound to happen.  I'm getting better though the older I get.  Hopefully by the time I reach my old age I'll be happy with my wrinkles, dentures and wheelchair and won't be comparing myself to the other granny's in the nursing home. 

When my hubs and I first got married we were young, and dumb, and trying really hard to keep up with our friends.  I don't know if we recognized what we were doing at the time.  Needless to say we ended up in a bit of a bad financial situation.  I remember talking to my dad about it once and he asked me the question, "What do you have to show for it?"  (Meaning the debt.)  The answer:  Nothing!  Absolutely nothing but a bunch of headache and stress!  No new car, no new house, not a closet full of fancy clothes, no elaborate vacations, no nice furniture.  Absolutely NOTHING!  We piddled our nonexistent money away and were faced with the task of trying to dig ourselves out of a hole.  We learned A LOT from that experience!  Not comparing and competing with others was one of the lessons I STARTED to learn.  But that was only the beginning.

As time went by we decided we wanted to start a family.  After years and years of trying to get pregnant and not being able to I think we would have nearly given up every earthly possession to become parents.  Again, I started comparing myself to others.  I thought things such as, "Why do they get to have kids?  They don't even take care of the ones they already have" or "They are so lucky.  Not only are they filthy rich but they get pregnant so easy!"  Yep!  I admit it!  I was a total brat and had those thoughts!  I feel bad for it now!  I can now say that I don't harbor those same feelings that I once did.  I no longer have that ache and longing to become a mother.  I have a beautiful daughter and adorable son who have brightened my entire world thanks to the miracle of adoption.  I know now that I didn't need to get pregnant to be a mother. Adoption is NOT second best!  For me it was the BEST!

So here's the thing:  I was dealing with the battle of infertility while another person could get pregnant easily but didn't know how they were going to pay their bills.  Or maybe my friends were filthy rich but not happily married.   Maybe my friend had the most amazing body but suffered with severe depression.  Do you see what I'm saying?

EVERYONE IS FIGHTING A BATTLE!

Some are minor.  Some are fighting a World War!  Some haven't fought yet but will. 

I wish I could say that I no longer compare myself to others but I can't.  I have bad days!  I forget that someone, somewhere has it worse than I do.

I've had my battles.  I survived!  There will be more to come and I will fight!  But this I know...I wouldn't trade my battles with anyone.  They have made me stronger.  And like I said before, someone is always fighting a harder, more difficult battle than my own.  The only thing I can do then is reach out and help them fight and hopefully help them win!

Moments That Matter

Take the 3 minutes it takes to watch this.  It gave me goosebumps.  I need reminders like this often to remind me of what is truly important.

 

Have a fabulous weekend!

Something Borrowed

My SIL who is a 5th grade teacher (God bless her soul) gave me this gift idea for my daughter's teacher.  I purchased a water bottle, a cute little ice tray, and some drink mix.  I wrapped it up in cellophane and tied it with some rick rack. It looked really cute.  You're just going to have to take my word for it though because I don't have a photo of the finished product.  My camera is a piece of poo remember?  Want to know a little secret?  Cellophane makes a simple, plain, ordinary gift look fab!  Try it!

We attached a cute note that said:

"Thank you for "QUENCHING" Kam's "THIRST" for knowledge!

Isn't that adorable?  Thanks SIL for the great idea!

I know that school is over but the gift idea itself would be really cute to give someone this summer.

You could say:

Stay cute and "COOL!"  Have a great summer!  Save some guys for me! 

(Okay...so maybe leave off the "save some guys for me" part.  I was just having flashbacks of when I signed yearbooks in junior high and high school.)

Or better yet...if your sayings are as lame as mine just give the gift wrapped adorably in cellophane.

This is another idea along the same lines that we gave our kids birth mom's last year for Mother's Day!  

I started with a container of Great Value drink mix equivalent to Crystal Light.  (I promise this is one time that the no name is as good as the name brand.)

 

I wrapped it in some cute scrapbook paper, put it in a cute bucket with an ice tray and a sparkly butterfly pick.  I also threw in some chocolates that you can't see.

Wrapped it up in the magical cellophane, tied it with a ribbon, and it's ready to be gifted!  See how cute the cellophane made it?

(This one was put in a basket instead of a bucket.)

Enjoy your summer!  And remember...You are totally rad and 2 Cute 2 B 4 Gotten! 

Weekend Wrap Up

I wanted to do a weekend wrap up last weekend but never got around to it.  Oh well!  At least I'm getting around to it this weekend. 

Friday the hubs, the kids and I went to lunch at one of our favorite spots Wingers.  The kids love the popcorn and I love the creamy amazing sauce.  What's not to love?!  We then spent the remainder of the afternoon preparing for a garage sell we were planning to have the following day.  We hauled all our trash (soon to be someone else's treasure) a few miles to my BIL and SIL's house where we planned to have the sale.  We organized, sorted, and priced our items and then called it a night.

The following morning I woke up at 6:30 and thought to myself, "So this is what 6:30 AM looks like?  Who knew?"  I don't do mornings!  I'm more of a night owl.  I was running a bit behind schedule and hadn't had much sleep so stopped at McD's for a DC and decided to try their fruit and maple oatmeal.  Holy goodness Batman!  And not just because I was washing it down with a Diet Coke.  It really was good! 

Our garage sale started at 8:00 AM.  It started slow and then gradually business picked up and then slowed down again.  People kind of trickled in and out all day.  We weren't as successful as we had hoped so we decided we should have another sale next Saturday.  Apparently not everyone realized how valuable our crap really is so we want to give them another chance to purchase.  This time we are changing our location to a busy street where we're sure our sales will sky rocket!

I did learn a thing or 2 about people at our sale.  I learned how attached we become to "stuff."  My hubs was having the most difficult time parting with a receiver that he had bought at least 17 years ago.  He paid over $300 for that thing and it was in perfect condition. (This is what he told me)  We used to lay on his bed when we were dating and listen to the radio with that receiver.  (Note to self: Never let daughter lay on her boyfriend's bed and listen to the radio.  Better yet...don't let daughter have a boyfriend!)   It pained him to let it go for a measly $15 bucks!  As I was laying stuff out to sell I noticed myself putting some stuff back in my car.  I couldn't bear to let it go quite yet.  Can you say hoarder?   

The thing that surprised me the most is the junk that people are WILLING to pay for.  We thought for sure our clothes and baby clothes would be the first things gone!  We're talkin' nice, well taken care of clothes.  Name brand even.  Oh no!  We wondered if some of our items would really even sell.  We wonder no more!  If you ever think to get rid of toys that your children get from a kids meal don't do it! They're big sellers!  Jewelry=Hot items!  My favorite is how my SIL told me that she sold some earrings to a lady and the lady put them in her ears immediately.  Wow!  I think I would have at least taken them home and doused them with alcohol first!  If nothing else you should try having a garage sell for pure entertainment.

Oh....and Kam sold homemade brownies and rice krispie treats!  She ran out within 15 minutes.  One man bought 8 and her grandma bought 10.  At first she seemed annoyed that she ran out so quickly.  I had to explain to her that she made $12 bucks in 15 minutes.  It had taken me 2 hours to make the same amount!

We snuck out of the sale a tad early to attend my Gpa's 97th Birthday Party!  It was great to be able to see my grandpa and all my other family members.  We ate lunch, played games and then had Birthday cake.  That's after we sang to him and told him to blow out his candles that were nonexistent.  We're mean!  He's practically blind so it made no difference!

Sunday I took the kiddo's to church.  (The hubs was at work.) We were late!  Kam was ticked that we had to go because "church is sooo boring."  And, "why do we have to wear dresses to church?"  And whine whine whine!  Moose just runs away when it's time to get dressed or comb hair.  When I do finally catch him and try to change his clothes he is constantly flopping and jumping all over the place.  I don't know how many times I've been headbutted while getting him dressed!  By the time we made it to church I was NOT in the mood to be there!  By the time I left I was much happier!

On Sunday my man and I celebrated 13 years of marriage.  I guess I wouldn't say we celebrated anything!  Basically we said, "Happy Anniversary!  Love you!"  It was just like any other day.  Pretty pathetic!  On a happy note we do have something fun planned in a few weeks to really celebrate.  I'm looking forward to it! 

Sunday evening we had family pictures with my hub's side of the family.  Pictures give me stress!  It's so hard making sure everybody matches and stays clean.  I about died when I heard the hubs tell Moose that he could have a Snickers bar as soon as he was dressed and ready for pictures!  Really?  And what would make a person think that giving a chocolate bar to a 3 year old right before pictures is a good idea?  By the time we made it there the hubs and I were in a fight (which had nothing to do with Snicker's bars) and the last thing I wanted to do was smile let alone be near him holding his hand!  After a minute to calm down we were fine and happily smiled for the camera.  We even held hands!

Did I mention there were 23 of us there for pictures?  10 of those 23 being kids.  Talk about chaos!  Following pictures gma and gpa treated us to to ice cream and Diet Coke!

Lastly a funny story from the Mooser:

He is obsessed with saying Booyah!  He says it all day long!  I asked him where he learned it and he said, "Jesus.  I heard Jesus say, Booyah!"  Wow!  Who knew?  Even Jesus knows a 'lil bit o slang!

Overall it was a nice weekend!  My house is trashed and I have my work cut out for me today!  Wish me luck!

13 Things I've Learned in 13 Years of Marriage

Today I've been married to my man for 13 years!  Our wedding day seems so long ago to me.  So many things have happened in 13 years.  My hubs lost his hair, we both gained a few (okay a lot) of pounds, we became parents, we bought a home, we've worked many jobs, we've traveled, we've shouted, laughed, cried and laughed some more.  Life has been good to us and I've learned a lot!

1) You can't change your spouse.  You can only change you!  I remember my mom telling me that early in my marriage.  I learned this truth early.  It was still a difficult reality to accept!

2) Couples that pray together stay together.

3) "Many people, if they were to treat other people as they treat their spouses would soon have not a friend in the world.  Why it is assumed that marriage is more impervious to the effects of discourtesy than friendship, I do not know...." -Jo Coudert

This is one of my most favorite quotes EVER!  It hangs on my fridge and it is TRUE!  Do you ever catch yourself speaking rudely to your hubs (or even kids) and then the phone rings or someone knocks at the door, you answer it and you're as sweet as can be?  Not that we should answer it and speak rudely to our friends and neighbors but maybe we should reevaluate how we speak to our family. 

4) Never say NEVER!  Never say ALWAYS!  This is one my husbands biggest pet peeves.  "You NEVER do this or you NEVER do that!"  "You ALWAYS make me do everything or you ALWAYS make me feel like crap!"  You get the idea.  (I've noticed that those same words strike a nerve with my daughter too.)

5)  Write it in a letter.  Sometimes (well most all the time) when I'm angry I will say things I shouldn't have said.  I also get flustered easily and have a difficult time communicating how I feel.  If I give myself time to cool down and think it over it makes a big difference!  Lately I've sent the hubs an email explaining how I feel.  I try not to be rude, but I'm honest and express my feelings to him.  I don't think it comes across as harsh and the hubs seems to receive it better.  There is a blog I looove where a gal and her husband do a weekly segment called "Dear Dave + April".  They each write a letter to each other sharing how they feel and what they can do better to strengthen their marriage.  I love to read their honesty and to know that nobody has the perfect marriage.  We can only keep trying and working at making it better.

6) Be Best Friends!  The first time the hubs and I hung out was in high school.  The first time we hung out we weren't on a date.  We whip creamed and saran wrapped our U.S. Government student teacher's car.  (I prefer not to explain at this point but let's just say he deserved it!  The perv!)  We went and had a ton of fun together and there wasn't the weird stress of impressing each other because we weren't on a so called "date."  Later when we went on our first date it wasn't weird or awkward.  (Except that I was convinced that I was taller than he was.)  We were best friends from the get go.  When he left on a mission I felt lost.  I could and still can tell him everything.  (Well, almost everything.  Sometimes it's better if he doesn't know how much the grocery bill totaled.)  The best part is when I'm with my hubs I can be myself! 

7) Show your man affection!  Compliment him.  Tell him he's hot!  Hold his hand!  Bust a move!  Smother him with kisses!  Praise him when he loads the dishwasher.  Men are babies and they need the recognition.

8) Go on dates!  This one is tough!  Let's be honest....it's a hassle finding a sitter and making arrangements but it's so worth it and most of all it's important!  And....it's good for the kids to know that our marriage is important.  If your kids are like mine the beg us to go out so they can have a babysitter.  Along those same lines an overnight away is awesome too.  Two years ago my man took to Island Park for our anniversary.  We laughed a TON and had a blast!  Although we missed the kids it was nice to be kid free and just enjoy each other for the weekend.  We need to do that again!  We are WAY overdue! 

9) Don't fight in front of the kids!  They will hate it and they might even tell your mother!  Not only that, they will pick up words such as Jerk and A-hole!

10) No Name Calling

11) Don't agree to help with something and then grumble and complain the entire time you're doing it.  (Unless of course he can't hear you.)

12) If your husband snores so loud your kids think there are 4 wheelers driving by then he should go to a sleep lab and have a sleep study performed.  They will put him on a CPAP and you will no longer spend your nights on the couch.  He will sleep well and wake up happy and you will too.  (PS-CPAP'S are NOT sexy!)

13) Communicate.  We communicate.  We say it all!  Maybe even too much!  I'm learning how to communicate in a way that isn't hurtful and doesn't include yelling.  (Hence the emails and/or letters.)

These are only a few of the things I've learned in the past 13 years! I think we have come a long way!  We've made it this far!  Here's to eternity!        

Something New

Several weeks ago I had the opportunity to go on a girls weekend getaway with my mother-in-law and 3 of my sister-in-laws!  The hubby's graciously (ha ha) stayed home with the children.  We joked that it would have been fun to be a fly on the wall to see how they managed.  My hub seemed to manage just fine.  Moose told him he was "the best cooker!"  When I asked the hubs what he served him for dinner he said, "I buttered and toasted his hot dog bun, grilled him a hot dog and sliced up fresh kiwi, apples, and bananas."  Who would complain about that?  Not me.  Unless of course I didn't like hot dogs.  Even if that were the case the fact that the bun was lightly buttered and toasted would have made up for it!  Wouldn't you agree? 

We headed to Park City for a weekend of shopping, vegging, laughing and eating.  My brother-in-law and the baby of the family was nominated and picked to receive the All American Award in Lacrosse which just so happened to be presented to him in Park City!  Could things have worked out any more perfect?  I think not!  And so we were able to be there to watch him play in the All Star Game and then receive his award the following night.  We are so proud of him!  He is such a great kid and uncle.  Our kids are sure going to miss their Uncle T as he heads of to West Point in a few weeks from now.

Jen, Me, Shawna, Kelly, MIL Cindy, Baby bro Tory, and FIL Lynn.  Would you believe I started dating my hubs when Tory was 2?  Crazy!!!

Here we are at the Wasatch Brew Pub in Park City.  If you're wondering where to eat in Park City try this place and the Loco Lizard if you like Mexican food.  (Which btw is my favorite.  My husband is convinced that I should have been born a Mexican!)  

 Jenn, Me, Cindy, Shawna, Kelly

I had quite a few "FIRSTS" for me on this little trip and I thought that it would work to share it as my "Something New" for the week. 

My sis-in-law introduced me to a new food that has quickly become a favorite for me and now even the kids. Have you ever tried Laughing Cow Cheese?  If you haven't you should!  It is so good.  And the best part is it is only 35 calories per wedge.  We use it on bagels, wheat thins and even veggies.  It's quite tasty.  Kam and Moose will open a package and it's gone after only dipping 3 crackers!  I have only tried the Original Swiss flavor so that is the only one I can recommend.  And another tip from my SIL was to buy it at Sam's Club to get the most bang for your buck!

Our next new discovery on this vacay was this:

Does that say no sugar added you ask? Why yes!  Yes it does!  Oh...and why hot cocoa in May?  Well...ummm...we live in the land of snow and bitter cold weather that drags on and on and on and on!!!  Are we all on diets and crazy health nuts?  Not really but we are all trying to improve and eat better.  (Trying being the key word as I eat a stack of reduced fat oreos washed down with a Diet Coke.  I make no sense even to myself!)  My point is....this hot chocolate is delightful and is only 50 calories a serving.  Try it the next time the temperature drops below 30.  Which in our case could be tomorrow!

The next item isn't exactly new to me but I have only tried it once and it was a teeny tiny taste.  Even still I was sold.  If you really know me you're going to die because again...it's something healthy!  (Healthy and Tristin do not go hand in hand.  Seriously they don't.  You have no idea how big of a challenge it is for me to eat good!)  But this stuff is good.  Even the Moose Man liked it!  (Who am I kidding?  He eats anything!)   I have only tried the vanilla flavor but have heard that the chocolate is quite tasty.  That will be my next attempt!

For breakfast we were able to cook in the condo that we stayed in.  We decided to go with something filling, quick, and easy.  My SIL suggested egg sandwiches on bagels with turkey bacon.  And FYI-turkey bacon is really good too!  But here is the NEW catch.  Did you know you could cook an egg in the microwave?  Yep!  You can!  My SIL proved it!  Crack an egg or 2 or even some egg whites in a microwave safe mug.  Spray the mug with cooking spray first.  Stir with a fork.  Microwave for 60 to 75 seconds and watch it rise until it almost overflows over the cup.  It won't though!  Let your kids watch.  They'll think it's really cool!  It was so good and super filling!  (Oh...and spread some of that laughing cow cheese on your bagel and egg sandwich.  Yum!)

Me, SIL Jenn, and SIL Kelly

One night we rented a movie, ate our healthy snacks and kicked it.  I loved, loved, loved the movie we rented.  Have you seen this?  It was so cute, funny and sad all wrapped into one perfect chick flick!  Rent it now!

And last but not least....I bought something NEW!  I bought quite a few things that were new but I really splurged this time!  Again...if you know me well I'm cheap.  I shop the clearance racks and I love a good sale!  I'm certainly not Miss Money Bags so I like to stretch my dollar as far as I can.  One of my sisters once said that even if I was filthy rich I would still probably shop the clearance racks and have a hard time spending money.  She's right!  And to make things clear I don't have a hard time spending money.  I have a hard time spending money on a pair of jeans that cost more then $30 bucks!  Or buying a pair of shorts for a 6 year old that costs more than $10.  It sounds pathetic doesn't it?  Maybe it is but a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do in these economic times.  Blah! Blah! Blah!  So what did I buy new you ask?  Better yet what didn't we buy?

I bought new pants, flip flops, swimsuit and a bra.  But the real "out of my element" purchase was a....hold onto your seats....a hat!  Oh my!  I know.  I'm a loser!  But I see all these girls around wearing hats and I think they look cute and I wanted to try it too.  Not to mention I get sick and tired of doing my hair every single day!  Every girl deserves a hat day every once in awhile!  

And although I may not be as trendy as all the other mom's out there at least I tried something new and I'm proud of that!

(Want to know what I did that was NOT new?  I said something stupid!  I tried to tell everyone that I don't know how to curl my hair with the Wii!  Idiot!  I DO know the difference!  I know that a Wii is NOT a tool used for doing hair and a flat iron is NOT for playing Mario Cart!)

Come back again for Something Borrowed!   

Remembering Grandma

Today I'm thinking of my Grandma Lois.  It's her birthday today.  She would have turned 89.  I think of her often and I miss her too but it doesn't make me sad.  Why?  Because I believe she's happy where she's at.  I also believe I will see her again someday and that makes me smile too!  Until then these are the things that I think of when I think about Grandma Lois:

-Jergens Cherry Almond lotion

-Scented candles burning in her house at ALL times

-Her tan legs, painted toenails and flip flops

-Sitting in HER chair reading a novel and drinking a Diet Coke or Pepsi

-going to her house on Sundays and eating Lucky Charms but mainly eating the marshmallows in the Lucky Charms

-Pepperidge Farm Goldfish

-Homemade Reuben Sandwiches (No one made them as good as she did)

-Helping her make her bed as she got older and how she wanted the bedspread put on a certain way by following the seam in the bedspread.  I never could figure out what in the hell she was talking about.

-Easter egg hunts

-She called my daughter Kami which is NOT her name.  Kam Bam aka Kami still remembers.

-Perfume

- Her fridge was ALWAYS stocked with soda and her cupboards full of cookies and candy

-Easter candy served at Christmas and Christmas candy served at Easter

-Her frail weak hands that couldn't even button up her own shirt

-Toaster Ovens

-Vacuums

-Clip on earrings (Which by the way my sister took to a bead shop and they turned her clip on earrings into rings for each of the granddaughters.  Brilliant!  Love mine!  And very vintage!)

-She always had gum in her purse.

-Taking her to JC Penney and then stopping for an Orange Julius and french fries

-Lunch breaks at her house during work

-Christmas and Thanksgiving dinners and her homemade pumpkin pie and mince meat. (Yucky mince meat.)

-Nagging and scolding grandpa
-crocheted covered hangers
-showing me as a kid how to make a pocket out of a paper napkin so I could fill it with snacks and goodies
-one of these cup dispensers in her downstairs bathroom

-ballet house slippers

-Ice cream and otter pops

-basketball games and pool

-picnics on the patio

-bike rides to her house from Providence to Logan and then hoping someone would drive us home

-her generous gifts and willingness to help her children and grandchildren

-Magazines to read on our Sunday visits

-Playing Guess Who, Go Fish, and Old Maid

These are the memories that I keep and cherish in my heart of my grandma.  One of my most special memories was being able to visit her as she was ill and dying in the hospital.  It may sound weird and a bit morbid but there was such a peaceful feeling during those times.  I'll never forget visiting her with my cousin about a month before she passed.  If I remember correctly she was on oxygen at the time and very difficult to understand.  I remember her saying something along the lines that we were "her girls."  And we were.  We did what we could to help her and serve her because she did so much for us and all her family.

 

On Halloween Day 2009 while surrounded by her family she peacefully passed away.  We each took a turn telling her we loved her and then my grandpa told her she could go and she did.  We were sad.  We cried.  And now we remember, laugh and celebrate her life.  Whenever I eat ice cream with the Magic Shell ice cream topping I think of Grandma.  When I wear my clip on earring ring I think of her.  When Kam plays dress up with one of her purses and I get a whiff of her perfume I'm reminded of Grandma.  When I sit on the bar stools in my kitchen that she sat on in her kitchen I think of her.  When I cook pancakes and grilled cheese sandwiches on her griddle I crave one of her Reuben's.  When the kids and I play her Guess Who game I remember the hours spent at her house.  The memories flow vividly through my mind and her legacy lives on.

I love you grandma!